Many Halloweens ago, I had a fairly wild party at my apartment in Boston, though it did not even begin to compete with my neighbour's wild parties: weekends of electron-polka, screaming into the night, and a floor made entirely of mattresses--you could sort of see on tiptoes, standing on my garden wall. But that's my business.
The point is: Martha dressed as eighties style Strawberry Shortcake. She was a little bit too sexy to be the freckled cartoon character, but she paid respects to the original Strawberry we all loved from old Strawberryland, the one who skipped about in a pair of barely peeking bloomers, striped stockings, and an enormous bonnet, trailing a green ribbon and sweet Custard the Cat close behind.
Strawberry, to my complete distress, doesn't look like a lovely human cupcake anymore (Martha doesn't either, she changed right after the party). And I find they've modernised Strawberryland to seduce a whole new generation with a world that hints at the delicious psychedelics of scratch n' sniff dolls: where one's hair is perpetually perfumed by berries, unlocked houses are built of eternally ripe, massive strawberries, the gentle landscape is a rolling frosted cake layer, and the only chocolate tree-forts are in a neighbouring land run by a boy, obviously--most likely banished from society for his embarrassing, dessert theme name and naughty pet, Devils Food Ruddy Shelduck. Or something.
And nowadays they dress Strawberry quite differently: a brimmed hat, tight jeans, a stripy long sleeved tee, and a bright sweater tied around her considerably narrowed waistline. Where are your enormous bowed shoes? Those huge, freckly cheeks we all loved? Oh Strawberry, Strawberry how could you?
Then again, the Benetton-ish changes aren't all bad. Modern Strawberry has a friend of colour that goes by the unobjectionable name of Orange Blossom, and one exotic Ginger Snap who I imagine sounds and looks rather Asian for Strawberryland, and the soon to be added Matzah Muffin who will never, ever, be old enough for her Bat-Mitzvah. It's so sweet it makes my teeth throb...
Anyhow, this has very little to do with with the following recipe for Strawberry Shortcakes or, an excuse to use up a bag of dark, red, ripe strawberries that Glyn's cousin gave me a few days ago. I need to use these strawberries today. They go bad you see, in the real world, fruit decays. That's one of five reasons I don't wear paisley printed knee socks, go by the name Brown Sugar Biscuit and live inside a hollowed out, ripe, Alphonse mango in Strawberryland. I make the parts in this order:
For Sexy Strawberries:
1 bag of ripe strawberries, hulled and quartered
4 tbs sugar, or, to taste
4-6 tbs of strawberry vodka
2 tbs lemon juice
1 tsp fresh thyme (basil or mint would be nice too) finely chopped
Once strawberries are prepared, add sugar, vodka, lemon and thyme. Take about a quarter of the strawberries out and mash, then add back to the pieces. Let macerate for about a half hour. I suppose this is optional, but I strained the liquid: a delicious mixture of vodka, tart strawberry juice, and sugar, and reduced it to a syrup. Then chilled it, and added it back to the strawberries. I'd add another squeeze of fresh lemon just before assembly.
For Brown Sugar Biscuit:
2 1/2 cups flour
1/2 cup fine almond flour
1/4 tsp salt
1/3 cup packed brown sugar
3 tsp baking powder
5 oz salted butter, cubed and chilled
2/3 cup whole milk
In a large bowl, combine all dry ingredients and whisk to blend. Using your fingers, rub in the butter until you have a coarse sandy texture. Incorporate the milk in three parts, leaving a small amount for brushing on top. Form the dough into a smooth ball, roll out on parchment paper to about 3/4 inch thick. Chill in the fridge for a half hour to an hour. Cut small disks, the size is completely up to you. Scraps can be rerolled. Bake at 350 degrees for about twenty minutes, or until done. When cool, cut with a serrated knife and keep aside. I like using the scraps to make tiny, bite-size, flat biscuits that I can put a blob of cream and a single strawberry on.
If you want to eat the biscuits again the next day, or the next, to have with butter and honey, or butter and raspberry jam, mmm...save the rolled, raw dough, and cut and bake only as you need. They're always best warm from the oven or only just cooled down, and the dough will keep just fine for about two-three days in the fridge. This recipe is enough for 4-6 biscuits.
For Yuzu Cream:
100 mls whipping cream
2 tbs greek yoghurt
2 tbs sugar
few drops lemon oil
2 tbs yuzu juice
When it's time to assemble the dessert, smooth and loosen the yoghurt, sugar, and oil out with a tablespoon or so of cream, so there won't be any lumps. Then add back the whole to the cream and whip to a soft peak. Add the juice and whip again to soft peak. Yoghurt and yuzu add a pleasant sourness, but you may find that you need more sugar, I like the whole dessert quite tart. Taste test a spoonful of macerated berries with the cream, it all depends on how sweet the strawberries are, and of course, your own taste. To assemble, simply sandwich cream and strawberries between a biscuit, and pile extra strawberries on the side, if you have any.
I find that most of the time, especially when the weather is so good and the days long, I prefer having something sweet in the middle of the afternoon to after dinner. This is no exception, though it would make a lovely dessert after a light meal, I prefer to serve it with tea (or with strawberry vodka if you're having a particularly bad day monday), outdoors on the lawn, and quickly. This isn't Strawberryland--youth slips away, the sunlight fades, but most importantly, the biscuits will never again be as tender as the afternoon they were baked.
I can't entirely decide whether I'm embarrassed or flattered over the description of my Halloween costume. Any descriptions of a certain black vinyl bodysuit worn by a certai person should, I'm sure, be omitted.
Oh, when you said that Strawberry Shortcake had gotten a makeover, I was so worried from your description that she'd gotten all tarted up (hah! I kill me), Bratz-style. I'm glad to see she's still basically sweet and cute, but I miss her hat and her dress.
Also, I must say to Martha, I was making hard boiled eggs tonight on a whim, and it always makes me think of you. Perhaps you should post about hard boiled eggs and your terrible history.
Oh Martha, I thought your costume was brilliant! I do hope, upon rereading, you steer towards flattered. It was cute and sexy and you made it--it was my favourite costume all night, and there were so many.
And you're right, I thought it irrelevant to the recipe to mention any black vinyl bodysuits...Ahem.
Whitney, she's not as bad as Bratz, but I'd still say Strawberry is a bit tarted up now.
Thanks for the suggestion Whitney. I probably should write about my complicated history with eggs in general, and the hard-boiled variety in particular.
Yes, I'd like to hear more about this history with eggs. It gets mentioned a lot, but I never seem to catch the whole story...